But if trading secrets for honesty is so liberating, then why is it so difficult? In my case and many others, it is because of #shame.
In his book Jesus Is Better Than You Imagined, Jonathan Merritt wrote:
"Secrets draw their power from shame. I convince myself that I am too messed-up, too tainted, or too tarnished for others to accept. Or maybe people will think I am a fraud. As I believe these lies, shame grows into fear, which is almost always at some level, fear that if others truly know me, they won't love me. Or at least love me as much or in the same way. In order to release my secrets, I must uncurl my white-knuckled fingers from deep desires: My desire to be perfect. My desire to be liked. My desire to be in control. My desire to be successful."
"Shame keeps us from telling our own stories and prevents us from listening to others tell their stories," says Brené Brown. "We silence our voices and keep our secrets out of the fear of disconnection." In the end, shame steals the very thing it promises: meaningful, authentic connections with others. Pursuing a life of honesty means to reveal who I truly am and assert that my #story too belongs at the table.
During #Segue2017 Tier II, Joel and Avin Reimer bravely shared their family's story of working through Joel's sex addiction while serving in South East Asia as Global Workers. I can't thank them enough for their #courage in opening up about this painful time in their lives, and for sharing how they are working through it together.
With their permission, we recorded this 90-minute session for a Here and There Podcast so other GWs could learn from their story, be encouraged to open up about their challenges, and get help where and when they need it.
We know it's a longer-than-usual podcast, but in order to preserve the integrity of their full story (bad and good), we're presenting it to you entirely in one piece. The pause button is your friend! 🎙️⏯️👌
"This is my command - be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the LORD your God is with you wherever you go." - Joshua 1:9
#sexaddiction #shameandgrace #redemptionstories